www.lindaikeji.blogspot.com
HIV positive Kenny Badmus comes out as gay on a Facebook post
Brand expert Kenny Badmus who took to his Facebook page to reveal he was HIV positive on
Dec. 1st,
this morning took to his wall again to reveal that he is. He wrote
about how he got married and led a false life just to satisfy society
and how he told his ex-wife before they got married that he's gay and
how she didn't care hoping he would, with time, stop being gay.
He also talked about how she allegedly victimized him when he eventually
got fed up and asked for a
divorce 6 years after they got married and had a child together. Kenny
said he decided to share his experience to mark the one year anniversary
of the Anti gay law which was passed on Jan 7th 2014. Read what he wrote
after the cut.
When
I first told my ex-wife that I was gay, we were far from being married.
I wanted her to find other men honorably, who had a thing for women. I
never did. I ‘swear down.’ I was only obeying the popular demand of
traditions. Now, this was my terrible mistake. No one should live their
life based on dogmas and other people’s expectations. As far as I could
remember, even though I was always dating girls, I had always preferred
being with a man. I had fought it with every fiber of spirituality in
me as a Pentecostal preacher boy (find details and journeys in my book
‘THE EXODUS.’) The more I fought my sexual preference for men, the more I
became more miserable. Unfortunately, as erroneously believed, sex
wasn’t the problem. I had been having sex with women as far back as a
twelve-year-old. Sexuality is whom we are emotionally present with, not
whom we are sleeping with. And oh boy, she really tried to make me a
heterosexual. But I'm still not, sadly.
One of those
pre-marriage days, while we were with our marriage counseling team, I
brought up the issue again – that I had always had a preference for men.
I wanted the Ministers to dissuade her from the marriage. I just
couldn’t put a ring on a fat big lie. My father taught me one principle:
DIE FOR YOUR OWN TRUTH, EVEN IF IT'S UNPOPULAR, BUT DON'T HARM OTHERS
WITH IT. She was so happy to tell the ministers, as quickly as she
could, that my feelings for men would all be gone, because she believed
it was a childhood disorder. I guess she meant she was going to fuck my
brains into heterosexuality. This is a mistake a lot of us make. We
all want to change people to conform to our preferences. We find it
easier to play god in the lives of people we did not make.
After
six years together, I knew I was not getting any better. I STILL LOVED
MEN. And one day, because I didn’t want to cheat on her, I humbly asked
her that we should go our separate ways. That was when all hell broke
loose. She suddenly forgot about how it all started. In court, she told
the Judge how she suddenly found out that I was gay, and how it’s
against the Law of the Federal Republic of Nigeria. In other words, she
wanted me sentenced to the new 14 years jail term served by the Nigerian
government. Luckily, I was in a civil court. Sadly, that day, I had
to duck my face in shame as the crowd jeered at me for being whom I had
always been. 'You faggot' 'Oh what a shameful man!' 'homo!' 'Na wa o ' I
still don’t know how I walked out of the court premises that day. (
this case is still ongoing) What about my business.? Tell any client in
Nigeria that you are gay, and you lose their business. That’s exactly
what happened. I lost friends, businesses, sponsorships and family
members. I had to start my life all again. Applied for a new job. Get
back to school. Although my ex-wife is one of the most faithful and
beautiful women in Nigeria, she is a victim of institutionalized
homophobia. Just like many people who are reading this.
It will
be exactly a year today, when Nigeria instituted a law to jail people
like me. What’s our offense? Because we are simply wired differently.
There are only about 5 to 10% of homosexuals in every population as
cited by popular findings and documents. Why is a 90% dominant
population afraid of its 10%? Shouldn’t you care about us? Don’t you
think it’s a lot easier to be seen as part of the 90%? And before you
throw those religious verses on us for being wired differently, I want
to leave you with my favorite Bible verses from Romans 8:Italics mine:
That Nothing Can Separate Us from ( the universal narrative of ) God’s Love
31 What shall we say about such wonderful things as these? If God is
for us, who can ever be against us? 32 Since he did not spare even his
own Son ( in the popular narratives according to the Christian Faith )
but gave him up for us all, won’t he also give us everything else? 33
Who dares accuse us whom God has chosen for his own? No one—for God
himself has given us right standing with himself. 34 Who then will
condemn us? No one...
38 And I am convinced that nothing can ever
separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor
demons,[b] neither our fears for today nor our worries about
tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. 39
No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all
creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is
revealed in ( in the narrative of ) Christ Jesus our Lord.
living the good life!
